21st Century Man

I'm kidded a lot around here lately because I have this thing for watching "Home Improvement" all the time. As we buy DVD seasons, I am free of commercial interruption (and corruption) but the flip side is that I can run a whole lot of episodes back to back and it grates on the wife's nerves after awhile! I get a lot of kidding for watching Tim and Al all the time. But there is a purpose behind my almost addictive need to view...

What is not confessed on my part around here is that I'm secretly trying to find and get in touch with my male side again. I grew up not only in the racial confusions and tensions of the sixties, but also in the feminine movement that has so changed and confused the old concept of the macho male being. I have two mothers... and both are very liberated... were more so during the time I was a young man growing up. They weren't much defined by the mother/housekeeper type near as much as other women of their day were in this valley at the time...

As a result I think I feel that many of the men of my generation were sent out into the world with many mixed signals and new concepts of what our role in the world was. They say it used to be so simple! The guy went out to work in the morning, the gal stayed home and made sure it all worked there. If the car broke down, it was the guy expected to crawl under the hood, if the child acted up, it was mom that did the actual frontline war duties... dad was merely the threat that would close the deal at the end of the day... Then along came "Mr. Mom" and "Private Benjamin" and the whole world was turning upside down!

Now I had good male examples growing up, don't get me wrong! My dad could fix anything, and it was rare that he didn't have a power tool or a wrench close to his person at most times! My first experience with a skill saw, however, left my dad in great fear for his life! I cut through the cord... I was done! I never liked working on cars... either it was too cold or too hot, or then all that grease and dirt and all... and no two boards would line up for me for anything to save my neck in shop...

So I turned to writing, and music, and then accounting, and went for the office work that would keep tools and other such dangers out of these hands that weren’t built for the tool box! As a result, I have tender and sensitive hands, as well as a tender and sensitive heart. I don't like macho male war movies and you can keep your sports and extreme recreational shows, but I love to sit through a "feel good" marathon and to have a box of tissues handy for a chic flick! This is extremely embarrassing for me to admit, so watching Al, who is the guy on "Home Improvement" who has the real working skills but also has an ability to be a sensitive man, is a relief to me! Knowing that men exist like Tim who are extremely macho grunting oriented, but totally inept with tools is also very helpful to my confused male ego!

To keep tabs on what should be a clearly defined male persona, I have kept a beard for some time now. The ladies around my house love this, so it isn't a point of contention for me as some of my other male counterpoints have run into in their homes. It helps me keep my manly focus on those days when I'd rather be with the girls at the office gossiping over next week's American Idol hero, and which shade of lipstick would accentuate my skin tones, and what earrings would look better with my light blue chiffon ensemble.

Come to think of it, however, a lot of guys are showing up at the plant with just such problems... how to keep earrings out of the machinery and highlights on the cheekbones on hot sweaty days... my daughter told me tonight that some are out there now worried about eyeliner getting in the eyes when they get sweaty driving in the sun...

Tim and Al, help me! I'm getting so confused!